Or should that be…
No… this is college. College needs be taken seriously. Yes? Now, straighten up. Better. Continue.
Ok, fine. Hrmphf.
So, Summer A starts today. For those who don’t know, in college, they split the summer semester up into to two 42 day chunks and push an entire 3 credit class into it. Basically, it’s the college equivalent of loading a clown car for the show…
…because they have to get in all that stuff you normally do in 16 weeks and squeeze it down to just 6. I don’t know about you, but in my book, that’s dwarf star level of compression type stuff.
So… as to get as early of a head start on my courses as possible (because 42 days zips by really, really fast), I logged on first thing this morning (I take online classes, in case you were wondering) to find out why my instructor had not put a book up for the course to be bought so I could get an even earlier head start (I blame my wife for this fascination for getting ahead… ugh, it’s so painful) and to make sure I covered all the day one stuff that I had too… you know, on day one (what a concept, right?).
And my favorite part of Day One activities? The introduction.
Yeah, it’s sad, but it really is my favorite part of the entire class (it barely edges out receiving that final A grade by a smidgeon… an itsy-bitsy smidgeon). Why? Because it’s that one moment when I can take the spotlight, squarely focus it on me and say… “Look at me! Look at me!”…knowing full well nobody is going to read it. /sigh
But! Not to be wasted… I felt it necessary to share what I wrote, just so that you, my 3 readers who are actually still reading this, get to see the glory that is…
My Introduction to myLiterature and Popular Culture Class
Literature and Popular Culture Class
(ok, I totally read that in a booming echo voice as I typed it. Go ahead, try it. It totally makes it more awesome.Totally)
My name is R. Todd (fine, my first name is Rodney, but I don’t go by it) and I am taking this class to satisfy my final diversity credit requirement. My advisor recommended it (after I pulled most of my hair out due to the fact that it wasn’t listed as an online class (who knew I needed to know the nuances of UCF’s class coding)) for the aforementioned requirement.
The first thought that came up when I saw the umbrella was, Wait, did she say we didn’t have a book? Oh, thank God I can stop pulling out what little hair I have left trying to figure out what book I need for this class. Now, why is there a hand drawn dissection of a manta ray on the page? Wait… is this a science class? KHAAANNNNNNN!
After I realized it was an umbrella (because, you know, I read the words (reading, after all, is fundamental)) intrigue settled in and I scratched my chin. Hrm, this could be intriguing (you already said that (oh, right, sorry)). Hrm, this could be… interesting (sigh). Wait, does that say ‘Perverts’? (raised eyebrow) Ohhh, re-he-he-he-lly? This might be an entertaining class (You! Back in the box). Derrida? Freud? Popular literature… wait, did she say Dalek? (cue heavy baseline theme music (Wee oooh wooooo)).
Now, the last question leaves less room for internal dialoguing (Oh does it? Does it really?) so I am forced (unwillingly and with great protest) to set aside the previous schtick (that’s such a great word) for a more formal response (puts on tux and bowtie (cause bowties are cool)). Ehem, so… I expect the umbrella will become the covering that will define the outline of the class, showing the students in a visual way each facet that we will be covering and how they all tie into the common ideology of perverts… (nope, totally snickering at that.. I tried. Honest, I did…)
Yeah, I’m totally getting an A in this class.
Or an F.